Jokes

blode

 

Have you ever wonderd what it would be like to live in a "Blonde World" 

Well here is a "Year in The Life" 

Remember offence is only taken and not meant! 

Enjoy 

 


January
Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

 

February 
Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....Helllloooo!!!.......bottles won't fit in printer!!!

March
Got  really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....Box said ' 2-4 years!'

April 
Trapped on escalator for hours ... Power went out!!!

May

Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June
Tried to go water skiing.......Couldn't find a lake with a slope. 

July
Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....earned later that the other swimmers cheated- they used their arms!!!

August
Got locked out of my car in rain storm....Darn car filled up with water because convertible top was open.

September 
The capital of Californiais 'C'.....isn't it??? 

October
Hate M & M's.....They are so hard to peel.

November  
Baked Thanksgiving turkey for 4 1/2 days. Instructions said bake 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!

December

Couldn't call 911......there's no 'eleven' button on the stupid phone!!!


Finally:

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his  attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house.  

A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, 'Is something wrong?'

To which she replied, ’There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, 'YOU'VE GOT  MAIL!'

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